SAND CASTLE, 7 --The Story of Patient with HIV/AIDS

EPISODE 7

Talitha pouring juice into the stemmed crystal glasses that have been filled with ice cubes, drinks it feels cold in the throat. She wanted ahead beautiful sunset on the back of the house that has been transformed into a park with fish ponds and decorative lights beautiful. Cindera go play basketball, Titan monitor branch restaurant outside the city. Men who have been that her husband was having many reasons to leave the house, she was taking care of this household – up Cindera the teenager - nearly themselves. Cindera is very fond of her, he seemed to know his mother's difficult life.

Marriage has been running for life his only child, Talitha quietly become Titan does not depend on the presence of the husband was merely a shadow, he accustomed themselves to resolve any something, she does not lack anything. Slow she loved solitude and gradually became uncomfortable with the presence of Titan.

Why?

How difficult to express,  love in marriage is no longer trace, there is only responsibility. A moral impetus that forced her to pretend as if she lived happy life. Talitha think repeatedly about the divorce, but Cindera is not mature enough, divorce will make the lives of children in shock. Talitha very devoted to her only son and she can do anything, including pretend to be happy with marriage. Is not this true world a theater?

Talitha resilient enough to survive from raging storm, Titan never knew, that lover who failed to reach faithful within marriage still waiting until he was moved to the evening. Love knows no boundaries of time and be able to marriage through walls thickest ones. Talitha ever vowed to never let  touching a man after marriage. An oath is too pure and seemingly pointless, because Titan no oath was a price to pay comparable. Talitha know there is a part in life that never unattainable, but for what she kept on crying, too a lot of things to be done and for that tears have dried.

There are times when the lover in the young came to the house to eat, greet them, but Talitha did not give any reaction unless the relationship friendship. One thing that makes the former hit misses revenge. Talitha not want to bear the risk associated with a married man, the extent to which he step - any bad marriage it - the cheating husbands will continue to return to his wife. Talitha did not want her chewed and then dumped like taffy rubber has lost its sweetness. Women were more enjoy the solitude and responsibility rearing Cindera.

Twilight slowly falling in gold colour , Talitha sipping juice with favors, she was witnessing the amazing moment when the balance of nature shake very slowly, changing of light into outages. Suddenly phone rang, Talitha grabbed communication tool, not a number known stamped on the monitor, she did not never reject foreign nonor. She pressed button and a voice answered, "Hello, good afternoon, sorry to whom I spoke ", Talitha smooth and melodious voice.

"Sorry mom, it's a Filesia. Once again I apologize, but I have convey something that is not fun, I hope you  does not become angry, "an unknown voice reverberate in the phone.

"O yes Filesia, how? There can help you? "

"Sorry mother, father at home?"

"Dad was going out of town".

"I'm sorry for the mother, the mother again do not be angry, but there was foster father's wife young, named Anita, she was there stay rented house in the back office area near the restaurant field ", the sound was re-echoed by slowly, but sure. For Talitha resonance that is enough for undermining the sky above it, the neck she seemed to choke, throat blocked, but he did not want to lose self-control. Talitha is still in very quiet voice, as if nothing happens around anything, "From Where Felisia know all that? Where did you're in my phone number? "

"There's a  father photo in the living guest of  Anita house , and your  phone number mom.... asked a friend, There are many people who know the mom ".

"Who is Anita?"

"She had  work at the bar, but father pick it up and put in the house rent ".

"Well, thank for your you information. Where do you live ? "

"I live in the Students' Army, mother survived the afternoon. " 

Phone lines, Talitha sat stony-faced gutter, eyes half dizzy. Time seemed to fall into that hole most cold and suffocating, the sun slipped hurriedly packed up the rest the light. Atmosphere into the evening twilight, became dark, then quenched, as replacement light fluorescent lamps swallowing black. Talitha still sat, not a tear trickle. What to mourned? An unidentified call said bitterest thing in the relationship of the presence of a third party, for reasons of mercy. And name it Anita, seemed familiar.

Talitha mind matted  she should return rotate clockwise hours, trying to remember and recall. Her eyes closed, there are sharp objects tearing gut, causing untold pain. In the dark she came back to get the look face it, her countenance an employee very beautiful that has been fired then bluff with a threat. Snapping it proved today, women bitch stabbed her secretly from rear, jealousy towards Anita true. Talitha eyes the meeting closed, she could see  thousands of fireflies, wind tornado spins like a hundred tops collide, and faces bitch mocking giggle stupidity. Talitha head feels dizzy, stomach nausea, staggering woman, It leads to the bedroom, slamming self to bed, let her asleep-asleep - to the fanciful nature. In this way, Talitha attempt master emotions.

The next day woke Talitha with a limp, but   she had to do routines for Cindera, preparing breakfast and pocket money and took off teen boy go to school. Talitha do all it as it is with a maid who has a dozen years of work at her home. Cindera  chew breakfast with gusto, the child grows into a handsome young man who many chased pretty girls. He kissed a pair of his mother's cheek and then ran as if flying into the garage hunt beloved motorcycle, join the friends who had crowded waiting.

There is one thing that must be done Talitha after Cindera go to school, cheerful ahead of his world. She must Anita oversees residence for test the truth of a person the called herself Felisia. Twenty minutes Talitha then has sat in seat the car behind the wheel, her eyes kept supervise a small house looked deserted as there appears to be no sign of life. The gate was locked as well as curtains and shutters, lights in the living room is still lit, the sun has moved to the top of the spruce, but the occupants have not been also grows. What do prostitutes when Titan was coming to visit?

One hour, two hours went by Talitha started hot and tired, she opened the seal soft drinks and began to sip it slowly. Tape recoderder not emit any sounds, thoughts Talitha middle dead end, she did not want to hear the sound anything. She just wanted to prove that the house is really a place to stay that bitch Anita. Towards three hours after the hit Talitha businesses reaping the rewards of boredom, signs signs of life began to descry, curtains slowly revealed. A young man rushed out from behind the door opening the car door and then start the engine. And she was only wearing a nightwear invisibility, she unlock the gate off the car passed with flying slowly roar road dust. Talitha's eyes widened almost nearly jumped out of petals, the women  was Anita,  how long she had never met, but the face and posture it has not changed. She was still as once when he was working as an employee, Talitha can not deny how Anita wrinkled appearance, appearance always filled with the power of natural stimuli, one the thing that makes every man feel weak.

However,  who men are hasty take leave in the morning when the sun while growing taller? Man obviously not a Titan, so Anita also received other guests? Whore! What to done? Hunt down and strangle Anita?

No!

And she does not need to demand recognition Anita and take back from the Titan , the woman hugs the road. Rice has into pulp, all already, errors could not get back and could also be forgiven. She just needs to do one thing, waiting Titan. Her decision was made!

***

Titan guzzling the last brandy and began to float, in her arms a young woman with open clothes, the most stimulating spoiled middle. On a typical day Titan will feel very comfortable in this atmosphere, but this time he felt strange. His breathing started tightness, which he used to pay women at will treat sudden lost its appeal. Unconsciously Titan  refused, he began to cough, breathing rapidly. 

What happened with me? 

Titan is still struggling to self-defense, he should be back tomorrow home on the first morning flight, the tickets are ready. He wanted to get back. Oh, he has been longing to Anita! An hour later, Titan has been quiet return, he paid  massaged and rubbed with oil wind. Titan slipped a few pieces dollars and then take leave with a kiss lightning, he should take advantage of remaining time to take a rest before flight tomorrow. The whole body suddenly arrived was tired, he never felt like this. And the flight to travel home is not fun, cold air blowing him chills, clogged breathing. Titan closed her eyes, how happy when Anita is currently at his side, the beautiful it certainly would have done anything for recovery. However, the current Titan can only be imagined, Anita's face remains descry even when a pair of eyes closed. Face it appears also in silence, silence of the row passenger seat, from behind the cloude, from all over, because Titan can never stop thinking about it.

The man still has the energy left for packing a suitcase on arrival, Talitha thought he had picked her up. Estimates are wrong, no shadow Talitha once flashed, he deliberately did not allow Anita showed up at the airport, Titan have a surprise. The man reach the airport taxi driver, he immediately leaned back in the seat, turn down the air conditioning and open the little glass windows let in fresh air spins in the car. Anita face again descry from smooth asphalt streets. Oh, Anita!

Twenty minutes later a car stopped in front of the house, Titan paid price of a taxi and opened the door to limp. He still hopes Talitha will greeted him with hugs and kisses gently on the cheek, but his hopes foundered. The man was immediately linked with a look Talitha cool, women who considered highly disciplined and self-reliant. Talitha was never whined begged you unfortunately, even beg love, self-esteem she was too tall, she is clever set position, she was never anything scary.

Talitha smart to find a solution, she realized the meaning of independence, because in fact no one can be depend upon except confidence. Talitha’s ages almost towards the head four, does it lose its appeal? The young woman becomes fascinating because youth and older women become more Interestingly, because of its maturity. Titan stepped up Talitha developed a hand, but the pace suddenly stopped, with his cynical wife dispose of view. Her voice was changes like the hiss of a snake poisonouswhen it began to say.

"I'm tired of playing, I hope all ends up in here. I would never ask you to go away from either Anita or prostitutes, because I know you'll never go away from them. Women street has become part of life. I ever expected a  happy marriage , because the purpose of marriage is to be happy, but  I just get  the opposite. Hope and patience finally ran aground, I do not get any kind of comradeship except treason. Chance out, I'll pay a lawyer for divorce, we treasure the two, Cindera right to choose with whom he wanted to stay, but I'm sure he would have been more happy to stay with the mother of in thousands of half a whore! "

"Talitha what do you mean........?" Titan voice broken, as thunder boomed right on the roof of his house, the man's breath.

"I mean obviously, I sue  divorce and give you the freedom to either living with prostitutes, because it's your choice. Guess right, you have a special relationship with Anita whenss he became an employee. Lucky I quickly fired! "

"If you do not fire her, she will still have the opportunity to live as a good woman ".

"Being a good woman at a time stab me in the back? You pretend a hero oversleep. Whatever I've done you will remain as a foster dog. Dozens years I tried to put off divorce, the time has come! "

"Talitha think with reason, we can still fix everything. Cindera need mothers and fathers ", the sound of Titan half wail, now he was a thieves were caught red-handed. Can he dodged? Talitha attitude is enough make him lose his nerve, the woman sincere with his words. He prefers to be a divorced woman of the play-act as the Mistress Titan. Wrong decisions that woman? Titan felt his head throbbing, body chills, cold sweat pouring.

"Yes, father, and Cindera require mother, so I know, but a child does not never expected his father to hide foster wife. You think I'm scared a divorced woman, you think I'm still dreaming of marriage? I do not want nothing but raise my son. Cindera old enough to understand the difficulty of his mother. If now you do not leave the houses, I shalll be packing up to leave, do not never stop me. If you dare hit me up I'll sue legal name. Chance out Titan, I'm fed up with this marriage! "Talitha pronounce all words with certainly, her chest felt relieved, she has successfully exceeds one of the most severe in marriage, the divorce statement. She was so tired of pretending he does not need again on the stage, although they had to bear predicate terrible, a widow.

As the husband had been pushed into the the arms of a prostitute. Is the title of a true widow horrible? She had a job and property enough to survive the feasible, Cindera will not stray. What will happen after the divorce? she has prepared for all possibilities, life and the choice is always full risk. She has faced situations worst.

Or is there more to be worse?

"Okey, if you are choosing lived in this house, that I should go! "Talitha take swift steps, she came into the room, took the suitcase and started packing clothes and all personal items, she also packed the entire Cindera items. Where she should be live? It was an easy affair.  Talitha’s hand keep moving, her feelings seem bland, she was determined to put an end to all this. She was to undergo confab new life without burden, without pressure.

Ups, the beauty! This nightmare will soon passed, one thing remains to be done is to hire a lawyer to resolve this difficulty. Titan feels as if thrown in between the pieces of the time, he was not dream, he was faced with worst situations when women were married while providing sosial status  honorable life. Now the verdict without giving opportunity to defend himself-is he still has the right to defend hisself? However, the divorce papers that would receipt-Titan feel the dark sky  immediately, stars burnt him with hot embers falling fire. Staggered move him when he intends to reach Talitha, gestures women who were packing goods was suddenly turned into a movie black and white, a silhouette, and finally blurred at all. Titan developed hand, a residual consciousness get on an understanding he would not be able to again sustain balance. Thousands of ants fire seemed to undermine his whole body, cause prolonged illness, continued prolonged, last no longer Titan feel nothing. Poor man's body fell down at the door hit wall, hit the tiles with noise breakable objects and fresh blood poured on the floor. Fight by Talitha always make the man fall, he really felt poor.

On behalf of humanity Talitha call for an ambulance help, in the name of humanity anyway she was still taking the time, effort, and mind to care for Titan. Will but the heart Talitha has become tasteless, she act and move without feeling, difficult or happy, she has turned into machine. With VIP treatment at home Talitha pain condition thought Titan would get better soon, so she can play the original scenario, issuing divorce. However, the almighty director requires a different story unexpected end.

One week after treatment Titan even more intensive conditions worse, the man has earned regained consciousness, but the power like nothing else left. Titan looks the weak-weaker-weight his body slumped in one weeks later, sunken eyelids, eyes without light. He looked wistful Talitha towards expecting a drop of love, hope it instantly destroyed, Talitha true has turned into a hunk of machinery. Her eyes were filled with hate and regret unforgivable, she was just sitting, silent speechless. Cindera much porridge or bribe role warm milk for his father, should Titan enough to feel comforted by the attitude Cindera behavior, but his health continued to deteriorated. Gaping wound in the head bleed changed be not be healed ulcers Careful treatment. His tongue began exposed to canker sores, diarrhea he suffered last prolonged.

I do not know how long the treatment has been running, but the signs towards there seemed no cure,  Titan had to struggle with difficulty breasth. Meeting the needs of air seems to be a very expensive, Titan resigned, he did not understand what was had happened to him until one day a nurse on approval Talitha take sempel blood in the laboratory to examine special.

And that day, after months Titan undergoing treatment, Talitha sat with frozen faces dealing Doctor Dewanti . Appearance and profesioanlisme she made Talitha can feel the cool breeze, she could not bear the burden alone. Talitha knew she was dealing with moments of the most difficult and troubling, seprofesional any doctor she remains can read the anxiety of rays eyes. The doctor sympathetic Dewanti on her.

"What doctor? What exactly is Titan disease, why he never cured? "Talitha voice weak and slow, across the table as the doctor Dewanti understanding grief heart patient's family, she smiled softly. Where there is a wife restless premises illness her husband? Is not husband and wife is a soul mate fused?

"Well mom, we have examined the fatther blood . Mom had to see for myself the condition father's health continued to deteriorate despite we have given intensive care, he should have a healthy and active as in the past. Ashma only trigger, Essence case is that the immunity father's body was gone, there was no power resistant to protect the mother's husband of the mild disease. Sorry, the mother had heard of cases like this? "sounds very doctor Dewanti  slowly, she was always careful. She midst of the most difficult duties, as difficult as the task of a hangman in carrying out the punishment beheaded.

"What do you mean  doctor?" Talitha feel the heart racing faster than usual, she was not acting, he was play a real play, a daunting role. She knows about the deadly disease that claimed the human immune system. However, for more certain she had heard directly from The doctor's statement.

"Sorry mom, very sorry t I have to say,  blood of your husband infected with HIV, ashma disease, head injuries and conditions deteriorating body, may also he was exposed to the pressures of life cause AIDS. Your  husband checked late mother self, no more drugs that can be given but wait time. Give the impression good in the rest of his life ", the sound the doctor was still slow, but in the ear Talitha words it is like boom guns blaring. Her breath was once heavily, her face pale, chest tightness, Talitha fight desperately to stem the tears, but did not stop her eyes wet.

Is this the end of the marriage,  happiness ever coveted? Who ever thought the wedding which surprisingly ended up covered with honey horribly. Talitha leaned back, closed her eyes, she had to fight back to absorb shocks that terrible struck without mercy. Titan has receiving a death sentence, not long, she did not have to pay a lawyer to issuing a certificate of divorce, because soon another death would soon separate. She will a respectable widow, because divorced by death, he does not need to persevere in court for a piece of the divorce papers.

The play of his life will soon be over, Titan only require casket and respects, the traitor now powerless nothing. But what fate? Is not HIV / AIDS spread by multiple partners? When Titan began infected? With prostitutes ?Where? Did she should fare same as Titan although  never get multiple partners? The mother is passive group that can be infected, because act of her life partner. My Lord!

"Is not HIV / AIDS transmitted doctor?" Talitha voice stammered.

"I ask permission, if the mother and child do not mind, we will examine Similarly the blood, so that we can immediately take precautions ".

"I let the doctor".

***

After the hit, then Talitha shall suffer the same to the second time. Lacing is much more enormously, as well as doctor's statement related to survival. Talitha back sat frozen, line of her face was cold with mounds snow polar regions, she also must be prepared received the death sentence. Talitha feeling restless moving clockwise, second cause fear, once again she was not on the stage, she  dealing with the fact that indeed.

"How about me doctor?"  Talitha’s sound doubtful.

Across the table the doctor Dewanti silent, she is already very expert stating this one, but the face pale woman in front of her had made her heart trembled. So many stories pierced from the hospital where she work, she has witnessed the tragedy by tragedy, and now, for the umpteenth time. The doctor felt the cold sweat start pouring, she breathed repeatedly, also felt that the wall clock ticking sound scary and finally said.

 "Good mother, we have examined samples blood  mother and Cindera, maternal child health, it is not infected with HIV. However, with very sorry I have to say, you  has were also infected, do not get AIDS. As long as the mother has a good health mother still has a life expectancy very long. Some people with HIV can last up to 18 years, they kept health, nutrition, and living in what it is ", to here words dikter Dewanti stalled.

The doctor saw the changes painful facial expressions, when innocent people who never had were also a verdict of death. Talitha more and blanched face-the blanch-she coughed, because choked by its own breath, sobbingmuffled sobs, her  eyes closed, water dripping from her eyes fall tapering lashes. Such scenes This went on for some time in and tense silence, until finally time limit everything. Talitha take leave, her head bowed when leave the doctor's office.

To whom she was about to condemn? Titan just a lump of flesh lying preparing to meet death, he had certainly also followed. Titan picked disease outside, take her back to home, also dragged into the grave mortality. Is this the end of her life?

***

Anita down day by day in quiet bite, she did not really know what actually that is still entitled to expect. Titan longing to have changed a knife wound, "her husband" was never comes, no news, he not permitted to contact via HP during Titan "disappeared". Anita does not have to feel guilty when he accepted the presence of guests for the sake of convenience, nothing can be done days except in filling vacancy.

She always tried to get shadows Titan shadow in every guest visit, but the effort was in vain. No one representing the self-image a Titan, the guests were "Foreign" any costly fees that have been given. Anita once tried to perform with different style, she wore a hair fake long and curly, wearing glass black eyes and a hat and wore dark. She ordered food at home eating place where it used to work, her eyes capture every move to see Titan shadow or Talitha, but couples no show nose. Anita searching the waitress did not know then asked, "Miss, I do not see the cast and Ma'am, where are they? "

"Mr. hospitalized, mistress waiting ".

Answer it made Anita silent, she understood why Titan disappear so long. And that evening when Anita slumped alone in the corner of the house with glass of alcoholic beverage in hand, the tone reminder message on her cell phone rang. Anita heart almost cheered when she saw Titan name on the screen, but written words and then make her face freeze:

‘Anita, how much I want to see you, but I was approaching the last. You no longer need to wait or reply to any messages. I hit AIDS, do the rescue rest of your life ....

Anita read the message over and over again as if in disbelief, she was awake, the message is real. In haste Anita tried to call the Titan, but the phone is off, once women it was panic-stricken. She is always waiting sensational moments and memorable with Titan, is there any situation more fun except within very close to a loved one?

What will happen in the days after this, she will soon be a leaf crashing and tumbling dry some where. Text message that was end all dream of Titan, she will be caught between the bars of time without able to scream. Anita again understand the meaning of pain, she was banging head against the wall, bursting into tears, roared, slashing, fell to the left is sobs. Power woman drained.

While in the middle of the isolation room Titan fighting for the final seconds, the body man only a skin membrane wrap the bones. Her cheeks prominent, sunken eyelids, very weak breathing, tongue and cavity mouth full of ulcers, she chewed food, swallowing drinks, and said with difficulty. No more hope to live, Titan realized last moments, the whole body is no longer has power. 

Titan was aware Cindera existence, how handsome boy single, if he can still keep she grew up, earned degrees, get a good job later held a party that marriage stunning. Ups, Titan closed his eyes, heart ache to imagine he would soon leaving his son. He knew Talitha will do anything to be happy Cindera, he believes the ability of his wife in a continuing responsibility responsibilities as a mother. Titan still trying to make contact with the inner Talitha, but the coldness she had punish him. Talitha has changed be faithful robot on guard the basis of compassion, not because want to always close, the eye express her hatred. Titan Feedback, Talitha would not have been forgive him, he has betrayed marriage. If time can be withdraw pulled back? Sorry always late and can not be change anything, except worsen circumstances. Slowly come back Anita's face, how difficult to forget her this one, even at a time when he was not will be able to again visit. He wrote Anita's last message to the rest energy and immediately delete the message and then turn off the phone. Talitha did not need to know content of the message.

In the corner sat Talitha in silence, her mind racing as thousands of arrows regardless of Gendewa, crouwded. She has drained all while silent tears herself in her room. Souvenir no right to know what had happened to his parents, Titan must have realized what was supposing has occurred, the middle pick death. When he would catch up with the disease The same? He has been infected with HIV, but he has an amazing health, Talitha never sick except feeling tired, she can treat it with rest, take vitamins multy and traditional massage services. With lifestyle healthy and responsibilities of  Cindera, she will try to stay healthy in order to prolong life. She will fight reaching life. At least until Cindera become mature and capable responsible for himself, so pick a time when AIDS as the angel of death she would leave this world in peace.

Talitha  avoiding eye contact with Titan, she still has to play-act plays role as a good wife and a "faithful" until the end of the coming day. Her feelings have become bland, she acted tough in front of Titan, she chose cry when alone, because no longer benefits sharing tears with people who will soon be bodies. Talitha understand the circumstances called with numbness. She was the middle throw a glance out the window staring colorful hibiscus being blooming when suddenly there complaint with the roar that is not clear.

Talitha search for the origins of voice and she immediately acquire Titan in a state that most heartbreaking. Titan hunt breath, breath- ragged, bony hand man trying reaching. Talitha looked stunned, she knew Titan is struggling to the final seconds, her mind become so giddy, so she unable to do anything. So Similarly, when the Titan hand kept moving for reach, eyes Titan so empty, she looks middle begging for a piece of love. Talitha still stunned, she silently passed the seconds scary.

The woman was still silent when Titan view of the vacuum, breathing disconnected, his head drooping, his arms thin fall. In the name of God Talitha closed eyes stare vacant it was, she knew hammy theatrics over. She stay packed up to leave the stage, replace clothing and makeup later appears as an actual identity.

Talitha, she did not need to shed tears, she gave a good example for Cindera and for prospective widow others. How should be facing death? She kept the Souvenir about his father's illness, let the secret was buried at the bottom of the grave. Finally Talita last settle the obligation, organizing the funeral.

Who does not know the Titan in this city?

Residence immediately flooded the crowded mourners, neighbor, relative, friend, companion, and coworkers. Funeral procession not experienced many obstacles, because Talitha is not much mess with whining- whined. The woman wore black, stood holding hands with Cindera. It stands majestically as worship started in the church so that all prayer can be offered appropriately. Then time move smoothly in a matter which is very appropriate. Talitha still strong enough to stem the tears, she stood motionless as the coffin was ling down to the grave and beyond backfilled with soil again and finally resembles a mound. Flowers scattered, our prayers are being said, so there are a lot of people face grief around the cemetery, but no howling cry or faint body fell sprawling. Talitha act like an artist who has prepared for the scene heartbreaking, takes the soul mate toward the last resting place, even without sobbing. She has demonstrated  fortitude in all mourners. She remained politely greeted one by one who passed away, is not the end man is going alone?

Talitha did not realize there was a mourners continued to watch from distance, mourners dressed all in black with a hood and glass black eyes, her pretty face real- swallowed real sadness. She was not wearing makeup at all, but line of his melancholy and pale, unable to appeal and charm. She  does not know all of the people in this place, she increasingly felt alone among the many mourners. No one was mourning for her, each mourners defense only gave utterance condolences and sympathy for Talitha and Cindera. There's no dripping water eye for grief, she also now a "Widow". Titan will never come again to pass the time, hold in the silence of the room, she can only remembering and remembering the warmth body in the sense of loss painful. What to do to make ends meet without a Titan? 

She lost the foundation of life, she lose the passion, drive, and dream took flight toward sky layer for heavens sake. Within its own a complete woman began to sob. Eventually the entire funeral procession completed, the mourners have completed humanitarian tasks, perform the obligation last for a person who has died. Talitha felt the stinging bite when she must realize her solitude, she lead role in a play  very well. She parted by Titan, because the cause of death, not divorce, the struggle against the sobs create a worn out, she was began to feel weak. Though has preparing for a divorce, but widowed. Which does not feel upset by death of the husband, the father of a  beloved son?

With heavy steps Talitha began move left the cemetery soul feels hollow, pit of her stomach torn shreds, she felt confused about her itself.  She  must take the very long to precipitate the whole issue and get back to a balance. Is not hard to be happy came and went as well as during the and night as a legal provision nature? Cindera requires responsibility his mother, Talitha aware of it. Cindera suddenly turns into a man adult, he showed fortitude in father went off, he was a man. True, he did not cry. He embraced the mother in every sense of love, Cindera know soul mother was shocked, he had act in place of the father in difficult circumstances like this. Cindera always hold  Talitha  releasing the goods at all, when the mother stop step, Cindera  stay with.

Out of nowhere suddenly before they have stood a young woman  in attitude and mourning clothes. Who is she?

"Sorry ma'am, I forgiveness if in life ever take anything from the mistress. Whatever ever I can, finally no one needs to grieve for me, because this death. I just  hiding, once again forgive me ", she tears, it was dripping.

Talitha was stunned, she was like a plucked from a nightmare, she can still recognize Anita in the atmosphere of grief though. Talitha looked beautiful face in front of her, face is now covered loss, facial who did not express any hate, a   naive and stupid face woman. This woman is not rival! After the death of Titan, Anita will slumped back into the puddle the black in order to survive life. While he has inherited all wealth, dignity, and especially a children - Cindera – hatred Anita will just exhausting.

Talitha subconsciously nodded, stride as if floating when she passed away leaving Anita, sob whore cry that sounds like a scream starving wolf. Talitha closed eyes, he would throw all the parts of the story has hurt so deep, she still had to prolong fight, fight HIV, so that she would die of old age, while Cindera has grown to adult males. What else should regrettable, is not only a story of life just go?

 In the west the sun extinguished, gentle breeze blow abort frangipani flower, gently land air becomes cooler. Tinge aurora the absurd will soon pick up the rest light, the cemetery area will be dark soon swallowed by blackness. Talitha maintain energy left before he reached the door of the car, her whole body trembled when put all your weight on the seat car. A moment later she rose falls overturned.

***

Anita awoke from sleep with a weary, the whole room a mess, her moo worse than the condition of his bedroom. She has become a "widow" without inheritance memories and relics except piece that must be landfilled. What can be done without money monthly from Titan? Once she intends to follow the course beauty, gets a certificate then open a salon business with saving some money she had.  World will be the past, but now she is in a mental state at worst, it seemed to come good intentions immersed into the grave.

She even just lost the desire to survive alive today, she plunged into sorrow perfectly. During this time she was only able to rely on the body's energy stimulation to achieve a decent life and delight, she let himself fall into the arms of a male to male others. She  obtained wealth, but often also contempt, most positions low in the social life, and the latter a deadly threat.

Titan die because of AIDS, the disease clearly infectious, whether he has been infected? Is she going to die in a way that same as the Titan? Anita again sobbing, terrified pounce, she was now alone and alone, just how easy it is live play . If the father not die, if he does not have to participate transmigration, if mama not marry again, if the incident cursed not happened, so she should be evicted from her own home. I wish .... ups! There are a thousand if and all that impossible. Anita back immersed in tears, she lets her gnawing pain in such a way, she let the tears continued to flow until she finally realized that mourning period that too must come to an end someday. She must struggle for survival, how long she can stay in this rental house the entire cost of living to be covered? 

The neighbors isolate, because they knew she was not a women living well. She did not been a part of life in the neighborhood. When Titan still alive, she was still able to take refuge in in the arms of the man to simply got the belief that life. This is not entirely cruel. Now, she did not have shelter, desires to open a salon business has been dashed be ridiculous ideals, she have the talent and skill to skill it. Anita weigh and weigh until finally she reached a decision to come back to the mother, he would re-enliven the atmosphere of the bar, although no longer as a prima donna.

***

Ups, the  black world, life like death sucking mud increasingly powerful rebel when the victim for freedom. Alcohol, sparkling lights in the ballroom, casual sex, and  money as bad as marijuana make anyone addicted, traped -Caught-without being able get freedom themselves except death. Twinkle lights glowed like a starry sky hide mood most dark, ornate sex workers in the most erotic performances, laughter, and dancing, chasing the mirage-Nothing the story ends with laughter, life night is the perfect play for every woman entertainers and guests hunter pleasure, with the ending sob cry and the most tragic is dead, because of AIDS.

"Died of AIDS risk," Rima said lightly, as they was sitting on the patio of our room each gulp well, tonight there will be a special guest. Nova, the belle of the middle pleasure to out of town with a rich businessman. Mommy, Anita dam Rima entrust the quite beautiful to accompany guests tonight, they should be decorated as beautiful possible.

"Are you ready to die young Rima?" Anita asked.

"Everyone will die with a lot of ways, rice has become porridge, or you have the intention to go to the holy land, repent for all of this? " Rima say with ease, she has been accustomed to bitterness. As a stepchild received from the mother only scorn and blows repeatedly, the same body exactly as many drums that  times hit so lament continued roar up to the end of the village. The more mature pressure from the stronger stepmother, Rima weighing, thinking, and they eventually she chose to marry a widower who has oily brown hair sugar and butter he sold it last. So be it permanent residents bar until today. Rima forgotten counting time, or she was deliberately forgotten, she indifferent to scorn those who common in public places. Those people do not understand the difficulties life, they can only blaspheme, but I could not help her out of issue. And honorable wives It continues to condemn it, they do not know for what her husband would rather spend money in places entertainment of the building integrity households. Husbands chose living with polite women , but stupid, they do not understand. The most important thing required of a men. To this one could Rima laughing, she had understood, so understand.

"Ups,  Rima, go away from goals, establish take pray I do not know, what else went to the holy land. Like what it was dead? "Anita stop motion her hand, she can not deny, how giddy life without Titan. She just  fall in love with any men who became his guests, and pretending it was not an easy job. She had deceived conscience,  she underwent a story darkest plays in return bite of rice.

"What do you think of the actual Anita? "

"You do not want to do something to do new things, we can follow beauty courses, get certified and open a salon business? "

This question makes Rima instantly out loud, her mouth wide open, suddenly she has changed a  kuntilanak ghost. "When you have lofty ideals like  that, you think I have a talent Anita? My dear, I happy with the ideals, if you really can achieve it, I will be the fisrt customer  and certainly the most faithful. Hik ... hic ... hic ...! "Rima back laughed and giggled, she was really laugh exactly as kuntilanak –as the ghost--.

"Rima! Stop your laughter! "Anita in a temper, she wants hit Rima, but see facial expressions colleague her colleagues flew off. Rima was laughing prolonged, but  tears drop, face not describe the happy face, but otherwise. Rima closing laughter the face of grief, she wiped tears then re-swallow loss as Anita never say anything.

"How am I going to be able to finance course, every month I have to send school fees for my brothers and sisters, every year that number is always growing. They do not know what I do, but from anywhere source currency and always use same. I can not think Anita, I actually wanted to rest tonight, but what can make? I have to go back send money ", Rima's face changed a gloomy evening, Anita silent, suddenly she lost the passion to serve are having fun. When flushed body with the bath water, suddenly Anita body trembling, her late night with half of the heart, there is nothing wrong in her.

While Rima home early with so weak body, she had bruises on several parts of the body. The plied customers with lacing in the hotel room, she had no identity and suffer from sexual disorders. Rima actually experienced a most terrible in his notes as a prostitute, she grew to understand, how is not easy life should be lived. When bruises on the bodies began to disappear, then Rima again faced with the problem less serious, she suffered sex, she must rest and treatment, then hope to cure. Anita accompany Rima, she understood her grief. However, no matter how Rima diligent treatment, no matter how sincere Anita accompany. Disease Rima was not able to cured, even worse. Anita thought would be recalled Novi Titan, recalled the words of Rima, "Dying of AIDS the risk .... "

Risk was finally proven, Rima breathed her last day in Anita's lap, after doctors declared she was suffering from AIDS. Anita chest heave, how close he was to death, attitudes and behavior deliberately inviting death to come. She chose a risky job. Since death of Rima, Anita felt increasingly alone, no again moments mingle while gulp agency or go shopping at the super market enjoy some of the hard-earned results they have. At the bar is still there over two dozen female entertainers, will but death after death makes Anita feel left out.

What is interesting of the game is always close with death? After the death of Risma, Anita become increasingly understand how valuable life. She still has enough savings to start a new life, why she was not tried as an opportunity it's still there?

Anita thought and thought and then suddenly she possessed exhaustion, she enjoys a date with a young businessman with bag thick, but acting like boys inexperienced. The man was too spoiled and sucks, if it does not require sheet rupiah, he did not need to pretend draining, put the sweet gesture.

Ups! If Titas still alive? Anita finish the job tonight with reluctantly, she refused booking outside it an important role in determiningmonthly income of the mother. Woman it lay down on the bed, pair of eyes closed. In the dark though various face appeared alternately, first is the face of the father of the deceased, then Mother's face, his stepfather's face, a face March, Talitha face, facial Titan, Novi, and The last is the face Risma. Woman died in a state of restless, because she can no longer send money monthly for younger siblings. Her beauty was almost no trace of the disease ravaged, Risma not of few words, because the energy no more left, but her eyes were glaze has express everything. And she fear of death, she will enter a different world altogether, a world who have never visited, she be refused because the angel of death has been approach and complete tasks very well. 

Anita can not forget Risma eyes for the last time, she was a woman who can not fight fate, first to be a winner, dies Risma in defeat. The end of life of a the tragic prostitute, gripped by AIDS! Anita tried to fall asleep, she wants tomorrow wake up refreshed, but various thoughts raced as upheaval of war, he could force the eye muscles closed, but  she could not bring the entire the amount of sleep loss. In situations that certain sleep even  easy. When she finally goes down in a dream that completely fucked, cock have crowed, she can only be a few hours asleep. The whole body feels tired, the more from day to day, she needs to rest.

Mami permits. But after rest some weary days in body was also reduced, Anita went to a massage, go to a doctor to get healing.  She  hopes her condition will improve, hopefully settles, because she never get the state healthy as usual. There is something wrong with themselves, Anita began haunted by fear.

That day a group of medical team led beautiful female doctor to obtain duty to conduct HIV / AIDS test among sex workers. Mami had allow for the good of all parties, then each bar workers sampled blood one on one. Anita controlled feelings restless - she was plagued by a strange disease-sense. Prolonged fatigue of unknown where the tip base. With a budget residual courage Anita approached a doctor woman, "Excuse me doctor, can ask a minute? "

"O lady how? There can I help you? " She smiled gently, her face so clean, he must know that she was nothing more than a woman entertainer, but his attitude so respect. She faces each patient as a human being worthy of respect, any predicate. Anita suddenly felt no cold water soaks anxiety, she finding a place to talk.

"I'm Anita" Anita reached, she immediately felt a gentle handshake cotton when the doctor's hands hold it. " The blood test this makes me scared, but I must give up complete with identity authentic. Lately I feel tired, I was seeing but there is no change, whatever happened to me should not I have one request? "

"What is your wish?"

"I want to know what my blood test results, positive or negative, I'd like to hear directly from the doctor. May I come to where doctors worked? "

"Why not? Everyday I stand by in reproductive health clinics, lady may come two weeks after today ", Doctor Dewanti sweet face staring in front of her, she knew figure of a prostitute certainly save a thousand one story. Dewanti want to know what ever happened to this girl, so that it is determined he immediately hear the results a blood test from the doctor, but the time out and the place is not suitable for listening to a story. "I'll Anita coming ", a glimpse Dewanti smile, she tried to recognize faces Anita, so that one day when she met will be familiar with that face.

***

CLOSING

Anita ending story. Beyond the rising sun, women it drank a glass of water in the glass demolished without rest until she has drained entire energy to expose the entire life history, her throat was dry. No one consciously wants death due to HIV / AIDS, but how complex way of life, how not easy out as a winner in every issue. Whatever will happen to rest of her life at least she has given mirror for every family who is willing prism of his experience, so that the fate of children's offspring will not fall into a mud puddle like her.

Children need families, fathers and protect mothers, so that they can naturally grown as crops are growing, because the land lush and outpouring of fresh water. Anita feel the load on her chest began to decrease, breath of relief, he was grateful that at a time when the most critical one is still there doctors were pleased to hear history life. What an interesting story prostitutes, but a note was grey and embarrassing?

"Thank you doctor, you have I am pleased to hear complaints, good or bad may be of no use. Sorry I asked for too much time, physicians would have plenty to do ", Anita shrink tear, now she has really let go, why should fear pick death? She still has a residual time, maybe  she can still repent or otherwise she will be in the immerse themselves into the mud of life.

In a minute  doctor Dewanti silent, she was sucked into a series of stories. No time for tears to cry,  she has to understand, why would a be a prostitute? They had no choice. They should  death slowly as a the risk of death or picked up today. How every inch of life should be paid to the very expensive!

"I can understand, I'm not throwing waste my time listening to story, I'll try to share to others that such cases is not repeated in the other children. You still have time left, I hope advantage as possible ".

"Well doctor, I was excused. Thank you for the time, "Anita held out her hand, kissed the  doctor’s hand, she once again drain the tears  and then retreat to the door, she had to back into place with the head is empty as a vacuum.

She throat was dry again, even burning, Anita  deflecting step towards its cafeteria hospital environment. She was gulping glass of hot tea when suddenly hear the voice.

"Anita, is that you?" the voice was familiar Anita’s ear, when she turned in the direction of the sound source, a pair of eyes immediately widened.

"March!" without conscious Anita stood embraced in March, as has been half a century they have never met. March hugged Anita by surprise, since her friend take leave, then they never met againt, Anita disappears some where. Now, they meet without unexpectedly, however Anita looks different, not March anymore recognized as a  innocent country girl friend.

"It was me in March, but Anita you see it's no longer Anita first. I even pick up the middle of the day death ", they sat face to face, Anita felt he self getting smaller seat table with March. Her friend  in style uniforms, makeup earthy, black leather shoes, and its compact briefcase. March has been able to reached the degree and dignity of life, she is just a pile of junk no longer will be a corpse.

"What has happened to you, I always looking for you, but it seems you intentionally disappeared ", March taouch Anita's hand with sincerity, her appearance has indeed been changed, but friendship, fueled by sincerity is eternal.

"I guess I do not need to be told,  but you already know who Anita right now. My life is no longer as I work with HIV, only a wait a while to be AIDS. Everyone is afraid of death, is not March? "

"Anita?!!  March eyes’s start stagnant, what tragedy had befallen Anita? Companions look no different with a prostitute, the blind people  can so understood to smell her.

"If this be our last meeting , meaning there had been a set it up. I am grateful to all sincerity, greet to mother, you know how the news them? "

"Your mom still alive, as well as with father and sisters ".

"If ever Mother asks, tell no longer have to think about me, I'll go forever out of her life".

"Anita?"

"If there's the love, please you prayed a prayer for forgiveness  my sins, "Anita tears dripping, March figures remind all events in her life, since she was a young later childhood in the  take out of the village, transmigration and tragedy after tragedy continues railed like a torrent of all time.

Anita thinks attitudes will change in March, because of her appearance, but she was have eternal unshakable sincerity by the changes and situations, even when they have lived side really different. "I'm happy, at the end of life short there are people who love me, I ask your prayers March ", Anita was able to linger to March despite the attitude she never changed, she was not appropriate.

Anita pay for drinks then soon passed away, her pace hurry, she did not want anyone accompanied, although deep down miss March attendance. However, be healthy reject them, she must not let a good woman approached and attached to the place of his life. She must back to the original environment, life slums, steep, and full of pretense, forbidden for a woman carefully.

Anita did not know exactly how she could return to their homes except for the word heart led her. Consciousness girl half have floated when her staggered and then slammed on the bed.

What ideals are worth pursuing by a prostitutes?

****

Doctor Dewanti  was examining the concept invitation letter to be submitted to the head daily for signatures in commemoration of World AIDS Day World when an employee knock working doors, entered a few seconds later carrying a letter.

"Good day doctor, there is a letter for you, " a letter in  a white envelope with a stamp has been affixed delivered with courtesy. Dewanti turned the envelope, the back of the envelope sender's name written: Anita.

How's the girl? Apparently she can Also write a letter? Nearly seven months Anita there appears no snooker news story.

"Fine, thank you", Dewanti open desk drawer, grabbed scissors snag one one side of the envelope, she can not wait to read the contents letter. She really wanted to know the state Anita, the letter is composed only of a sheet thin paper with a row of posts neat. The doctor began to read, instantly then the pit of her stomach back hit!.

Doctor,

When doctor  reading this letter, then I was in another world, nature can visited after the people left mortal world. No one can avoid death, death will come sooner or later in many ways. Even if can, I want to die in a way better, such as dry leaves

detach from the stalk in late autumn. However, death came too soon on young age, because I was no longer able to protect  myselves.

If I had a family like doctor, maybe we can be friends colleagues to jointly combat the disease turn this off. However, destiny had I live forced me to be a piece of junk. Nothing is more black of life should I live. When it has been infected with HIV, then I've associated with over fifty people in a position to determine in the city where the doctor on duty. I am sure, in between fifty men, there will be infected then followed towards to natural death, leaving everything love. I know with all that I doing, I do not want to die buried disaster alone. I became infected disease from others who pay for the services my service.

Excuse me doctor, it will be difficult for physicians to understand the content of my heart. Community see me as a strumpet, as flirtatious women make up air thick, as the home wrecker, as salvage or junk, and as everything is bad and terrible. I just dust in this broad middle life, I want to destined to change, but what is the meaning

pinch of dust. How to care building stone mansion that can protect themselves from blowing storms and coming storm hit. However, steep winding road only allows

to build a dollhouse – a sand castle - buildings that looked "pretty", but equally vulnerable to home cardboard, so the waves licking tongue the smallest is sufficient for knock it down!

Regards

Anita

Dewanti sit as the stone,  paper letter clutched it tightly, she read repeatedly tried to believe the truth of its contents. Seven months ago Anita tells the tragedy of living with a shed tears, she still hopes that her will end life in repentance. Time This turned out to be a very brief  Anita at the end of life, deadly mud most black. The girl had no choice! The doctor felt a great weight settles in the head, he and levels of government as well as colleagues are struggling to combat HIV / AIDS, to save the whole town of infection of this deadly disease. Apparently not could do nothing to save an Anita, the prostitute was gone. Go with a statement that includes the solar plexus.

Is there she was late?

The doctor was throwing out of view window to the edge of summer late, and the scorching sun burn. Groan soil, dry baked, wind abort dried leaves, a pair of butterfly restless as if flew, restless search point of water. Dewanti exhale long, she recalled the wistful eyes Anita, stare back stab.

She was already very late save Anita, but still there many opportunities to extend the others Anita. A branch that naturally broken will soon be replaced by  bud then bloom. The doctor closed her eyes, her mouth whispered, "Goodbye Anita ......"

THE END