N E I G H B O R S

When that family have a new house in the neighbourhood I live, I stared with wonder. Although the stilt houses made of wood just like the other house, but seem more brilliant, because oil paint glistening in soft colours. The trees are already growing around it as if a small forest. The family has a terrace planted with flowers, a pool that gives a sense of calm when seen and household facilities are complete. I never saw the contents of the house, but when viewed from the outside I suspect, the house was equally good with a view outside. Occupants of the house is a father, a mother and two teenage children were handsome. The mother we know as Mrs. Myra is very friendly, she often gave us, kids snacks and confectionery. On Christmas day she first  been giving pocket money before around town to visit colleagues. There are times when she was a  Christmas gift before that day arrives, a simple gift, but make the recipient feel flattered. Me and my friends  never spoke with the father and the children, they were too busy with the daily routine and forget the little things with the neighbour, but Mrs Myra always  smile or give little money for us to buy a soft drink.
Years went by, suddenly I never again see the father in the house. I think he is going to agencies outside the region, but he just instantly come then disappear until the next year. Finally, I know the father has moved the task in his hometown for a better career. At home it is now only a mother with two children, Mrs Myra still often share snacks with kids around this neighbourhood. The following year a handsome teenage boys did not look well at the house. He has graduated high school, should immediately go to the university where the mother to college. At home that left two people, the atmosphere was a bit crowded, because the comrades of the youngest still frequently come to play or learn together. Myra's mother still shared the dish during the birthday celebration of the youngest, our neighbours well. The following year seemed Mrs Myra preparing usher youngest and his friends to the airport, the time for the second child to college, leaving the mother alone. The house seemed so quiet. On the morning of Mrs Myra As a rule such as watering plants while cleaning the whole house and then went to the office, she would take a rest during the day and then to the office again and return in the afternoon. She alone, but was too busy to think, that in the overseas. I do not understand why Mrs. Myra did not accompany her husband, she seemed to love the place this task over her love for her husband. I was too young to understand, or I did not have to understand. Since Mrs Myra alone getting close to the neighbour's children, she gives the entire meal over at her house. On holidays she cooked a variety of menus, she does not let the rest of the food is wasted in the trash, she shared a meal in a basket in the warm. Giving it causes the children happy unimaginable. As the children play around the house one will get the call to receive a basket, candy, guava or biscuit. I do not see why one could so happy to see the kids, maybe because I am still a child, has not been able to see one point of view from a different angle than the things I can afford to see from where I am standing. Time kept pace can never be stopped, stay home mother Myra initially looked lovely slowly turned into an old house and the older the woman however was always trying to take care of her. Likewise, Mrs Myra age, I still remember the first days when she was a young woman, but who would that be against the clock? Age everyone will eventually get old. One day when I was home on holiday from Timika, I found her house in a closed state. I guess Mrs Myra on duty outside the area or visiting children in college place. For days the house was empty without life until finally seem strange faces who settled in the house. Alien face was never reprimanded children, travelling to shake hands on a Christmas or share a meal with the kids. Where Mrs Myra?One evening I sat on the side of the house, waiting for the impossible Mrs. Myra face will emerge from behind the door, calling my name to give a toast, guava, oranges, or a basket of food warm. True hope is vain, coming out from behind the door is a face strangers who are busy with personal affairs, he did not know me as I had never known him. I am not sure to feel the loss of up to mama asked, "Who are you waiting for Bernard?" She seemed to understand the meaning of his gaze."Where is actually Mrs Myra?" I asked hesitantly."When you vacation in Timika, Mrs Myra take leave, she moved the task to place their children in college. She felt the weight part with children ", the answer mama accidentally pinching heartburn, I did not think Mrs Myra would leave the neighbourhood is faster than the overall term. I feel ashamed when I realized this pair of eyes glazed, it appropriate for a boy wept neighbours. I do not entirely understand what actually happens in a person's life in such a close distance, each heart is always filled with mystery. I may not uncover the mystery. I just stared at the old house with a feeling of emptiness, I wish we had time to shake hands as a farewell?"Bernard, everything is limited in time, there are times when people can be neighbours, there are times when a good relationship was over. Kids definitely lost, there is no longer a mother who used to distribute food, "mama as if she knew the meaning of a sense of loss, she tried to comfort, hold so that the tears did not fall on the cheek. Mama also know the meaning of separation, especially a sense of loss. Until a few days I always see the outside of the house, Mrs Myra, with a sense of vacuum, is there we will meet again although no longer as a neighbour? I do not know, I can not even answer that question. Myra's mother returned home, in a place so far away that only I can see in the map. I do not know how to reach it, I have not longer grow as men. One day I attended a classmate who are accustomed to go to internet cafes, I want to know what actually appears on the monitor, so that people can depend on social media. When Luke opened the dashboard facebook, I see the profile of Mrs Myra, in the background is a photo with two handsome young men, they are definitely her son. Then Mrs Myra picture was sitting among the flowers while holding a book. "Luke, it FB Mrs Myra, can I contact her?""Yes, there is a message that will you deliver?" Lukas asked."Yes, I would like to thank goodbye", appeared a piece of hope to say goodbye even without face to face. Lukas clicking Mrs Myra profile, send a friend request then click on the message, open space to write the words, "Write your message ...."With hesitation and stutter, I  hit the keyboard, I was actually afraid, but I really wanted to give words to Mrs Myra:

Mother Myra good afternoon, how are you? I'm sorry if I sassy send a message. I Bernard, a neighbour boy in the back of the house which often receive cakes and snacks from the mother. My friends using the account, because it has not got a FB. When they come home from Timika to my surprise, the motherhouse had been empty, I guess mom agencies out of the area, but mama says, mother mutation to the college kids. Now living new neighbours were not too I know. If I could give farewell, but not why. Time always limit everything, I'm glad we've neighbourly though I was just a boy. If you have time to visit the place of duty, I hope the mother is willing to stop by the house. Greetings from all the kids in our neighbourhood, happy family mother never knew ....
 Expectations are very small, that this message will get a reply, but soon when opening messages. I was shocked, apparently, Mrs Myra is online and instantly receive messages I send, she immediately replied to the message anyway.

Good afternoon Bernard too, but here it is daytime. Mother Myra surprise your message, Bernard's mother had forgotten about us as a family. Sorry, mom could not take leave, because, at that time Bernard invisible, mama says Bernard No holiday to Timika. True mothers return faster than the overall period, heavy-duty split with children. Bernard smart school can be scholarships for higher education, can also pay a visit to our house. True-time limit everything, but the longest time span even can not erase the memory of one of the presence of another person. Hopefully Bernard family has always been in the shadow of his greeting back to all my friends ....

 I did not linger in internet cafes, the heart feels relieved after you may contact Ms Myra, though only through short messages. In the west the sun is more inclined in the dim light at dusk boundary, fresh green leaves of golden moonlight. Step legs feel lighter when I walk home. I had to learn to mature to understand the sense of loss, that an introductory meeting or how beautiful will always end in separation, nobody can resist the time ....

B O A T

Regina was the first person who came to visit when Sonya decided to transfer to the interior for a writing assignment. She needs to settle in the long term with the possibility of the worst stuck in the jungle until the assignment ends. Sonya is aware of the risk. She was shocked when one day an unidentified woman came to bring a bunch of bananas, plain face, a friendly smile, "I will be here to help you '.Sonya had little say except thank you, she must prove the truth of those words before believe, on the basis of what this woman would come to help while both do not recognize the one with the other? Sonya deliberately did not give anything in return one bunch of bananas, she wanted to test there a provision that they're sincere? A few days later Regina did come, it offers help with household affairs, especially washing clothes and dishes. Sonya said yes while continuing to oversee do not let the small stuff items in his home were missing. Regina proves his kindness he did not take anything in the house except the request. Sonya gives little in return for housework for Regina. Regina came the next day and always come back to help with the hope of reward enough for their daily survival. Other brothers who sometimes took part also came to help, so slowly Sonya know almost all Regina relatives in this village. Regina prove the truth of her words the first time he came, she was always there to help. While year after year has been running, the two seemed to be relatives of the different tribes, because of deep understanding. Regina one ever forced her husband to ask for money, Sonya becomes angry, she gave a piece of money, but requested that Regina does not have to come. However, Regina could not help myself not to come, especially in difficult circumstances, she needs help to take care of the household and all the relatives are always short. Regina expectations in difficult circumstances only Sonya, she received so many gifts, money, rice, wear appropriate clothing and all items in the home that are no longer used. Sometimes within three months of Regina nowhere to be seen, Sonya deliberately went to Regina in the village to see how the situation? They relate very well for long years. One time after a dozen years at the job site Sonya get the home office a more livable, Regina is still often also come into the new official residence. She cleaned the whole house and wash then lying on the porch waiting time windy afternoon to return home with a piece of blue money, a bag of rice, side dishes, wear appropriate clothing and whatnot. She noticed the items that are not used anymore in this house to be brought to the village. Comrades Sonya was so surprised, when coming to visit for the feast and find Regina with her sister they also came to help in the house. They were like two relatives were always related to either indefinitely. Sonya knows what to do for the good relations that, she had a nice home to live in. She did not want to happen social jealousy, without request Regina she begs people's home from a competent authority to manage without a formal meeting, and immediately received a positive response. In no more than one year the people's house had stood, a small house that is so different from the traditional home too simple. Regina with her husband and two children can live in peace in a healthy home. When three TV reporter One comes to culinary coverage, a comment that Regina house is very clean and well maintained, as well as the condition of a comfortable kitchen to cook even with the furnace. Regina clothes smelled of perfume. Regina a lot to learn from Sonya in the care homes as well as himself, she has been much different. But how much is not easy to finance households, both she and her husband Paul have no fixed income. The entire burden of life impinge on the shoulders, she fights, because Paul did not have a cigarette, she should be able to bring a cigarette every day for Paul or men will show their original character. Regina needs a boat to go means the capture of fish in the sea, she was unable to make the traditional boats. The local government provides assistance to the community boat, but she did not know how to ask for help except to Sonya. Sonya can see how melancholy face it, how not an easy burden to be borne Regina. She knew she had to do something and in principle not difficult. As a person who has served a long time in this place, she knew almost all the decision-makers properly. "Can I get help from fibre boats?" One afternoon when accidentally met Sonya ask the competent authorities with respect."To whom?" The official asked."I have a maid who lived in the village," Sonya replied briefly, her heart was relieved when he saw the officer nodded in agreement. Not hard for him to ask for help especially for indigenous people in this place.Both Regina and Sonya had to wait more than a year to get the help of the boat, a period to be too long because of the anticipation and questions. That day when the boat finally be launched Sonya had to spend two days of leaving office tasks, so that the boat could be officially handed over to the heirs. Tears were rolling when Sonya almost gleefully Regina accompanied by several relatives of people standing on a support boat with the motor roaring temple. They waved and kept waving as a thank you is in after waiting long enough for the invaluable assistance. After the boat assistance is given once or twice Regina still come to help with household affairs, she still had time to take the advice of Sonya to take a snapper to the authorities boat. However, gradually the woman's face no longer looked for a visit or help. Regina has been busy with her husband gone fishing, revenue in one selling fish around Rp. 300,000,00 - Rp. 1,000,000,00. Is there a piece she still needs Rp. 50,000,00 plus a small bag of rice with a day's work at home Sonya.Sonya home dirty clothes pile up, she had to divide their time and energy carefully to wash the dirty clothes or he and her sons will never change. Years went on, Regina only come when the feast, the rest she was never interested again to walk away from the village to help at home Sonya matter how good the relationship between the two. Regina still come to visit relatives in the home Sonya solicited or not, "Regina already rich, we often fight, she did not want to lend the boat", said one of her relatives say. When finally the children Sonya back to Java to continue their education, Sonya never again celebrate the festive season in place on duty, she must accompany their children. Regina facial shadows of getting away, slowly Sonya forget arrival, she did not have to wait. She knew after having a healthy home and boat Regina has been able to overcome the whole question of her life, she need not come to help work at home with difficulty to get the rewards are much smaller than the sale of fish. Regina in the village was now a respectable woman. Sonya can understand why, after almost twenty years of Regina never alpha at his home, now after getting the boat assistance she never again show his face. However, there's one little question that can not be put to sleep. Is there this time she came, because true kindness alone or as desperate need of help. Is there someone who can actually be good without a tendency?

SAWHORSE

: I'm tired of racing

after pasture
desert, dry river
her flow of volcanic lava
now, what else?
dim sunlight engulfed eclipse
black cloud suddenly besieged
more black than the actual night
fireflies still sheen
fly
but I'm still racing
Similar time enemy
who holds revolver
ready to blow bullets

I
must
racing


Agats -Asmat, March 28th, 2016

M A R R I A G E

Studded with a thousand fragrant flowers please me down the aisle, but it turned out to be the groom had never existed ....

 After over twenty years of separation four friends were reunited, they sit facing the dining table filled with traditional dishes and fresh drinks. Atmosphere around the house eating it is a verdant paddy fields, shady trees and passing waitress serving food to customers. The four women looked at each other, almost nothing is changed from every appearance, the faces that even young scholars as excited to wear a toga. They know the meaning shed hanker after a long separation, is a mercy, that today all four can be reunited. At first, the conversation was heated interspersed with debriefing and joke, but ....

The Blue Shirts finally answering the question, "Actually I have been divorced?" The voice hoarse muffled sobs punctuated."Why?" Asked The White Shirts, a pair of furrowed brows, gaze filled with wonder."My husband suffered chronic emotional disturbance, he always suspected I was having an affair, sell girls, all allegations without proof. I have no reason for cheating or selling a child. Anger into a terrible routine. He had a firearm and a samurai, he repeatedly threatened to kill me, before it dies the better I saved myself. After the divorce I left everything, I start a new life with everything completely as is ", momentarily silent atmosphere, each at each other and then pausing with one long breath.

While The Brown Shirts talks resume, "If I do not get divorced, even though the marriage did not last more than five years. One morning when heading boarding house of a woman friend in their work, my husband right there. My head slammed into the wall and torn fifteen stitches, he spits when I finish my thesis. At home I only porters were preparing to serve the master, he settled in another city with the woman, having children for the rest of my second child. My husband just came home during Eid for visiting parents, we do not say hello, "it also resemble wailing voice, she was married at a young age before earning a bachelor's degree, at first he thought that love would give everything. It turns out that he received was a particularly heavy burden of raising two children with minimal income and stay at home mother-in-law. There was no defence he could do for the sake of raising children, but to survive in the pressure so strong.

The White Shirt also says, "I do not divorce, my children need the status of a family, even though his father treated me nothing more than a slave. Indeed he was wrong, he was too stupid to behave as an employer, because I could be more evil deeds. I have dedicated my life to raising children, shed all of the skills in the workplace, I saved with great residual income, so finally I can give the best for the children. I never care who his father, because they are flesh and blood. My husband returned to the village, married the widow secretly, I thought was dead, he's just the fool blindly try to knock down sandalwood trees, because envy fragrance. Sandalwood tree is never collapsed, when he decided to move the task to the homeland, matters of life I thought was finished, which should think about is the future of children ", the words spoken from the cold face without emotion. The white shirt seems to have felt too old to just grieve, he has lived the remainder of the assignment before retirement came, arriving as he left the bustling world. The Black Shirt finally also said, "My marriage is the biggest party and festive, I thought I was a princess who gets married to a handsome prince, live happily ever after. It turns out that happiness only whole corn, four children were given birth yet again an adult when he left home to live with a prostitute. I wish I could call him back, but no, he's gone forever, I care children alone. When I tried to establish happiness with another man, it was more ruthless than my husband's treatment. I ended the whole thing, I have to work with the open shop to support young my child. On the wedding night, in fact I was just by myself in the wedding dress, the groom was never there .... "The voice is flat with no emotion, The Black Shirt has lost all feeling, because of the bitter experience of life. Delusion of adolescence such a beautiful life marriage it was just a dream, a daydream that had long scattered. Not to mention the age of the head of the two when the wedding took place. Then silence, the four pairs of eyes looked at each other in a long sigh. While the glasses and plates started to empty, the wind still blows limbs. There was a warm atmosphere in the meeting, although each are present must tell things in life so bitter.

What actually has been in force? Everyone, especially teenage girls dream of a happy marriage like in a fairy tale. But the happiness it turns out costly conditions. A pair of brides not only declared right has grown up, but each party, both men and women are capable of independent, do not hang themselves from one another. Party women especially, when it has to follow the flow of gender equality, it has been able to act like a man. A woman should even have a higher education level, utilizing the educational levels that enter the hierarchy for career rising and potentially greater. Physical objects what you can not buy with money? Money is one of the means to achieve authority, even in the smallest institution, the family. Who is authorized to make decisions is the party that can generate revenue to fund the household? The issue is more complex in a marriage is a culture that has become customary community concerned. Patriarchal culture still dominates the lives of families in communities in the east. When put their lives on the man at the wedding loved sprinkled a thousand flowers, the men actually think women do not have any interest, except serve like a boy for everything that pleases him. Still, it is difficult for a man to recognize the benefits of a woman, even though she is a previously beloved and expected as a life companion. But culture, a system of ideas which was passed in the behaviour together, agreed, unconsciously push a man apply like a king to be serviced wife, or he can give the punishment for disobedience.

The heaviness of a woman is pregnant, give birth and then care children, so they have a better life than their parents. A mother could even do anything. The four friends whose reunion was still lucky, after marriage foundered they still can appear in young age, have clothing, food, shelter and education costs enough until her children graduated. Women who do not have a job, experiencing violence in the home, choose divorce, eventually had to choose a life that tragically, become prostitutes for the support of children who are born. There is a woman who says, because his daughter was always rebellious, "Does my girl need to know if her mother had to sell themselves to the tuition fee?"That question need not be answered and verifiable, because indirectly the mother had said, that he had sold herself for the sake of rupiah for tuition child which always defiant. Similarly, the heavy task of raising children, so that places prostitute met mothers who live with horrible for the survival of children born. So, what is the real meaning of marriage when the wonderful hope that necessarily ends with the tragic and terrible?

Time ultimately limit the reunion of four friends, they know there are women who fared well, because getting a wise man, placing it as a life partner, not a waiter who did not have an interest. The White Shirt finally said, "A woman does not actually need anything, except the wise man, acting according to the teachings of scripture of any religion, to feed and protect a wife in family life, so that the children can be brought up in peace ... . "



Dewi Linggasari